Welcome to my blog.
Not long ago my wife and I sat in a doctor's office and heard him tell us that I have cancer. It is prostate cancer. Of course this came as a complete surprise. I am a healthy and active 57-year old man. Husband, father, grandfather, small business owner, and long distance runner. Over the course of my life I have run about 75,000 miles or so. I am still going and, as I like to say, "all systems are go." No pain in the joints, etc.
And then cancer showed up.
Really? At first I was shocked. I did not know anything about prostate cancer. I had only heard that it was "common" among men and "slow growing" and that if you are going to have cancer, then prostate cancer is the one to have. I thought that was like saying if you are going to be in a car crash, then a fender-bender is the car crash you want.
Problem: it is still a car crash.
More than a runner or anything else, I am a man of faith. All my life, when out in the wilderness running, I have looked up to the heavens and talked to God. This is where my strength comes from. It is where my hope comes from.
Lately I have been talking to God a lot. Asking questions. Going over my worries and fears. Wondering how I am supposed to handle this latest challenge, this latest hill to climb.
What is really unusual about this whole situation is that my father, who is 79 years old, is going through the exact same thing. He also has prostate cancer. And my mother was recently diagnosed with breast cancer.
Three of us - cancer - all in the same month.
What are the chances of that?
So now I am on a journey. I have a huge mountain to climb - cancer - and it is unfamiliar to me. I do not know this path. My parents are on this journey with me. What lies ahead? I don't know. And what will the long term affects be? I am told that prostate cancer and breast cancer are curable. That we can expect to live for another five or ten years or even longer. Well. How long is ten years? 3,650 days. Not that long, is it? Makes me think ... what am I going to do over the next 3.650 days, or 5,000 days, or whatever number of days.
I am suddenly reminded that the clock is indeed ticking. For all of us.
My goal with this blog is to chronicle what happens on this journey. To write about not only what I find in terms of answers, but to be honest about the fears and the anxiety that I encounter ... and the hope that I find. Because I am suddenly very much aware of how much we all need hope. Every day. And we all need each other.
We are all going through something. Only God knows each and every individual story. But like I always say, if God can put the sun in the sky (and keep doing it day after day, year after year, etc.) then surely he can help me navigate my way through this rocky landscape I suddenly find myself in.
Let us run with endurance the race that God has set before us. Hebrews 12:1
And so I press on. A little scared, a little unnerved, but determined to make it.
Come with me.